Week in Review

It was actually an action packed week, which is weird, since I'm single, unemployed, didn't play softball, and only have three friends. But here are some highlights:

I was chosen out of 50+ applicants to join the staff of S39 Online, a poor man's Maxim. In related news, my split personality, Greg, was chosen to join the staff of S40 Online, a poor man's FHM.

The highlight of the week, by far, was making it into the Chicago Tribune and becoming the center of a feminist dispute. In response, I just want to say that I have nothing against women. I think they're great to have around in case you spill something.

Seriously though, I feel bad that I upset so many people. However, if they only knew me, they would have known that I'm not prejuidiced; I hate everyone equally.

On Saturday I was at the Yankees game and the 'Shames-o-matic Prediction Meter' was working over time in calling Derek Jeter's first career grand slam. However it was bound to happen sooner or later since I call it every time he comes up with the bases loaded.

Also during the game there was a moment of recognition for all military personnel since it was military appreciation day. I started to stand up during the moment of silence until I realized that they meant REAL military personnel and not, 'little bitches who spend four years complaining about having to get up early and then quit due to a shortage of baby carrots in the food rations.'

Proof that I subconsciously want to relive my childhood: my decision to work in a high school.

Further proof that I subconsciously want to relive my childhood: my decision to buy a bike.

Unfortunately, a friend of mine broke up with his girlfriend over the weekend. After doing so, he immediately called me up and wanted to hit the town. I was like, 'are you sure? I usually sulk about an ex girlfriend for 2 or 3 years before I start looking again.'

And finally a very special Father's Day shout out goes to Brian B., who I'm just sure has several illegitimate children somewhere in the state of Florida.