Week In Review

Random thoughts from the last week:

Always remember to practice safe cooking and use lots of condiments.

I've got to hand it to the sports talk stations down here again. First they came up with the premise that the Detroit Pistons have a lot of guys with names that sound like they could belong to hairdressers. (Chauncey, Tashaun, Lindsey, Antonio, Flip, etc.) Then another host said that if women's college basketball was a tv show it would have been cancelled more times than a Mary Kate Olsen dinner reservation. Great stuff.

I refuse to conform with society and give into American Idol fever. So much so that I refused to buy Oreos this past week even though they were on sale just because a picture of Randy Jackson was on the cover of the package.

Is there anything more awkward than being at a comedy club with somebody that you just started seeing and a comedian asks if there are any couples in the crowd and neither of you are sure if you should raise you're hand or not? Seeing a guy half raise his hand and then put it down quickly is priceless.

How can you can have a size zero in women's clothing? Wouldn't that mean that you were so skinny that you didn't even exist?

I just thought of a few new comebacks to say to people. First off, if someone ever says, "excuse me where do you get off talking that way to me?" You say, "I don't get off talking to you. I get off while watching porno tapes with your sister." And if someone ever asks you if something is doable say, "Is it doable? Well a fat chick is doable but that doesn't mean I'd want to do one."

If it wasn't for sports I would be a better athlete. That may sound contradictory but what I mean is that there are a lot of times when I want to go to the gym or play ball but there will be a really good game on tv that I want to watch. 9 times out of 10 I stay home and watch. Ironic isn't it?