The New Craig, Version 13.0

It seems like every few months or so I proclaim that there's a new Craig whose going to do things differently. Usually, I'm referring to my approach with girls or my eating habits. Maybe even in terms of living life to its fullest and taking more risks.

However, no matter the motivation I ultimately revert back to the old Craig: lazy, unfocused, self deprecating. Which is probably why I always thought I would make a good stand up comedian.

But this time things are gonna be different. I know you're saying to yourself: yeah right, we've heard that one before. And there's nothing I can say to you to dispute that. But this time I'm gonna make a conscious effort to uphold my end of it for as long as I can.

After all, I'm 23 years old. It's time to start doing things the right way. No more excuses. No more piggy backing off of others. No more letting life pass me by.

So from now on I'm going to work out like a fiend. Like I'm back in the military. Every day, twice a day. Running. Power lifting. Situps. Pushups. You name it. That infamous gut that I have grown so attached to will be long gone. In a few shorts weeks I'll be able to look down and see my penis again and I can't wait. In fact I just got back from a five mile run and will be waking up at 8 am to go to the gym.

Despite those proclamations, I'm not ready to commit to a healthier lifestyle 100% just yet. Richard Simmons, Billy Blanks, and those 3 am infomerical nutjobs need not apply.

It'll be a slow process but in general I'll be working out more, watching what I eat, and cleaning up after myself. I would commit to fully eating better but it's just that McDonald's is running their annual Monopoly game over the next few weeks and I can't miss out on the chance to win a million bucks! Hey, you never know. After that though I'll watch what I eat.

Now, if you'll excuse me it's time for a 100 squats.