Monday, September 05, 2005

Labor Day Blues

Just writing this is bringing a tear to my eye because as we all know Labor Day unofficially marks the end of summer. It's probably the saddest holiday of the year not counting your birthday if no one remembered, Halloween if you don't have a costume, and Valentine's day if your single.

Come to think of it all holidays suck but Labor Day really does in particular. Partly because it's incorrectly labeled (Labor day should really be what we call birth days) but primarily because it signifies that the winter, with it's flu season, ice buildup on your windshield, and iceballs thrown by punk teenagers is right around the corner.

In the fall the temperatures are perfect and the scenery once the leaves start to turn colors sure is breathtaking. But all things being equal I'll take the similar temperatures in the spring time any day of the week. Because at least then you have the whole summer to look forward to. Labor day on the other hand brings with it the thought of the coming bleak winter which just depresses you.

Despite being even more of a kill joy than the groundhog who doesn't see his shadow Labor Day is good for one thing: thinking back to all the good times you had this summer.

Which for me was getting fired, not finding another job since then, not having a summer fling, having my life story told in the 40 Year Old Virgin even though I didn't receive any royalties, having my idea for a movie about my softball team ripped off by Artie Lang from the Howard Stern Show, and coming to the realization that I am a bitter old man trapped in a 23 year old's body.

But that's just me. How was your summer?

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