Week in Review

Random thoughts from the last week:

There are three types of people who go to the mall during the day: housewives, underaged teenage girls cutting high school, and unemployed slackers like myself who go to check out the housewives and teenage girls.

What's the point of bleeping out curse words in songs on the radio? What do they think that by doing that we're not going to be able to figure out what was said? You might as well just air the song in it's original form. That way you won't have to pay someone to sit there and censor out the curse words.

I've finally found someone lazier than me: mall security guards who patrol on scooters. What's up with that?

It seems like you have to be gay or british to shop in H&M, drive a lexus to shop in J.Crew and be between 13 and 16 to shop in Aeropostale. I'm running out of places to shop at this rate.

If someone is from Long Island are they an islander, islandite, or islandian? I'm not sure but I'm pretty sure there's a good chance they're white trash.

I think that hand dryers in public bathrooms are a good idea because they aren't as harmful to the environment as paper towels. But did anybody consider how someone is supposed to dry their face after washing it?

My favorite part about September baseball is that the local papers cover the Red Sox more than the Mets.

Billy had the line of the week when talking about my desire to join habitat for humanity he said, "you're Jewish and there hasn't been a Jewish carpenter since Jesus."

How come there's still a tax on food during tax free week?

Did you know that when keeping a kosher kitchen you have to use paper products if you're eating something non-kosher? Last week, when trying to cook dinner at Katie's house I had to cut up the chicken using nothing but a plastic fork. It was a comedy of errors. Kind of makes me wonder that perhaps the owners of paper product companies are Jewish. That way they could come up with a rule about keeping kosher that benefits their business!