Welcome Back, Potter

I just saw a firefly for the first time all summer which goes to show just how much I get out. Usually it's because I'm watching the Mighty Ducks movies on HBO family but this time I had a valid reason. At least I thought I did. I was reading the new Harry Potter book!

652 pages and it only took me 25 hours, eight of which were spent sleeping, 1 of which was spent in the shower, and two of which were spent eating. Basically I read it in only 14 hours or a rate of about 50 pages an hour.

Ideally, I would have liked to have read it more slowly so as to enjoy it but I didn't want anybody to ruin it for me by revealing who died and or who the Half Blood Prince was. I had no choice but to read it as fast as possible. Problem is that I read it so fast the whole book is just one big blur and I still don't know what happened. But at least I can have my life back after a weekend spent devoted to reading. Which is incidentally more reading that I did in four years of college.

The series though is truly fascinating. To me, the most remarkable part is the ingenious plot, not just within any one book, but moreover within the whole series. It's so well thought out that it makes you wonder how one person, how one previously unemployed person, can craft it so quickly.

Being the conspiracy theorist that I am, I'll believe almost any theory I hear and so I'm drawn to the idea that J.K. Rowling didn't do this all on her own. Rumor has it that she found these old stories about a boy wizard (probably while rummaging through the garbage looking for food) and simply fine tuned them, turning them into the popular children's series that we are now obsessed with. (see Taginski, Leigh)

The proof lies soley in her husband (pictured below) who bares a striking resemblance to Harry Potter himself. Is the book based on him? Or is Rowling merely fashioning Potter out of qualities that her husband embodies? Perhaps she humanized the character in the already written novels and brought him to life by making him out to be like her husband? Maybe Hermione is based loosely on her own life?

Who knows for sure? But one thing is certain. The novels are so cleverly thought out, not just in plot or character development but in the names of toys being sold in the Weasley's joke shop that it would be almost impossible to make up all the clever details in such a short period of time. She's either the greatest novelist of all time or an imposter. Or maybe even an accurate historian disguised as a children's novelist. Maybe all this really happened? And is happening? Maybe there really are witches and wizards? Maybe they left behind these tales as proof of their existence?

Since most people already think I'm crazy, I won't push the issue further. Nonetheless the novels are great and I implore anyone whose too stubborn to read them to get with the program. I usually hate conforming with society, which is why I still haven't read the DaVinci Code, but this is different. This is a must read. After all, if it's so good that I can't put it down for 25 straight hours than it must at least be worth a shot.

The pope though thinks differently. Which just goes to show why I'm not religious. Religious types are so out of touch with society it's ridicilious. They still think that it's possible for it to rain leaches or for large bodies of water to be parted. Still believe that there's a heaven and hell. And yet they won't believe in magic despite the fact that several wizarding subjects mentioned in the book also are prevalent in modern society, i.e. mind reading, fortune telling, and time travel.

Personally, I think the Pope should spend more time fighting terrorism and less time worrying about whose reading the Half Blood Prince. But that's about as likely to happen as me going out on a Saturday night. After all, there are children's books to read and children's movies to watch on HBO family.